Back in ye old day, hijab (Muslim headscarf) was taken as a sign that a girl was “heavy religious yaar”. She would be considered strict and guys would generally know to keep a distance. Hijab probably shouldn’t ever be used as a religious barometer though. Plenty of women who don’t wear it are practising or more importantly morally fantastic and great women. In saying that, those that wear it shouldn’t be villified either! “Hijabis are just as bad as any other girl out there”, a phrase I hear quite regularly.
There’s been a notable difference between guys from ten years ago to now. How hijab seems to affect them. Ten years ago whilst navigating the marriage pool, I was never asked about hijab. I can’t work out whether this was because I was being matched through friends and family so they had perhaps done a lot of the work for me, sifting out those who had a problem with it.
Ten years on, it doesn’t appear to be the hijab per se that’s a problem. It’s about what’s underneath; “Can I see you without your hijab?”. Instinctively, as a wearer, the reaction is to take offence and find the question somewhat disrespectful. But when I think about it a bit more…..I actually get it.
Now I’m not saying to whip it off infront of every Omar, Ahmed or Ali. Infact, I’m not saying to do anything as this is definitely not an advice piece. I’ve ditched many guys who have asked me this question before even getting to know me. I find that disrespectful. Less so when a guy gets to know me for a bit, atleast has an idea of who or what I am and then asks (few and far between).
Many, I’m sure, will disagree with both versions. I try to think logically about it though. Attraction is important. It’s important to me, to an extent, so ofcourse it’s going to matter to guys. Most of us look fairly different without it and I won’t lie, some look better with it.
I attempted a twitter poll on this but having a small number of followers, it wasn’t hugely successful.
So what’s your thoughts? Any experience of this? Comments from guys and girls, wearers and non wearers welcome.