Welcome Home

Touched down back home.  New man, brief meet, numbers exchanged.  Life is no longer simple; basic questions of future plans, work day, family life seem devoid.  I’ve noticed a fairly consistent pattern in the men I seem to be meeting as of late.  Firstly, the photo obsession.  Clearly, I never leave that much of an impression if they can’t remember what  I look like.  My own theory, they probably forget if I’m curvy or just fat so need a photo to remind themselves (atleast that’s what I hope the photo is for).  Note, I’m curvylicious.

New man, photo sent, I don’t particularly mind.  Next on the agenda if the pattern follows correctly should be inconsistent communication, ok good, he commits to that step, the pattern is continuing.

“What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done?”.  First question he asks me about …. me.  Now that’s a new and rather odd one.  He’s thrown a curve ball, I’m not quite sure where this is headed and my reply is rubbish.  It bores him.  I ask him to be blunt.  “Ok, what’s the craziest think you’ve done with someone else?”.  I check (because I like to be obvious), if he is indeed asking me about my past sex life.  He confirms.

When speaking to me for the first time, turns out it’s not that important to ask me about my thoughts on anything intellectual or what makes a good human being but rather if I’m willing to give blow jobs after marriage.  Sigh.  Next.

9 thoughts on “Welcome Home

      • Well, I never went the traditional route myself, we met at university, and nearly 19 years later we are still together, and 14 years married…
        But I had to kiss plenty of frogs until I found my Prince, if you know what I mean!
        I see what it is like out there, hearing it from single friends, and I thank God, I am not out there now!
        But again, not to say there aren’t great guys out there… they just need really looking for…

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Well I think definitely this one is not worth more of your time! You need someone who appreciates and will cherish you. Don’t settle for less!


  2. Lol – poor man. How can he have reached adulthood without anyone telling him that this is *not* the first question you ask when meeting someone new?



    • I’m guessing it’s a chat most parents don’t have with their sons…..”Beta, what are first date rules? Yes correct, , no blow jobs, doggy style or flavoured condoms should be mentioned in the conversation”……..oh I omitted those parts from the blog didn’t I? ?

      It’s a chat most people don’t need to be given because…well…IT’S COMMON SENSE! Lord almighty.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Ha! And I got all happy for you when I read the first question was “What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done?” I thought he was interested in you as a person and had just broken the ice in a light hearted way. But no, many men are not interested in hearing you speak unless it’s to do with sex, because that’s your primary purpose in a relationship, right? You’re not there as a whole person… just as a couple of body parts!

    Liked by 1 person

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