All the Single Ladies

Getting older worries me, a lot more post divorce, than what it ever used to.  I don’t focus on getting married nor have naive notions about some husband providing for me.  I was never provided for when I was married anyway yet I still have many concerns for my future.

What if I become ill?  My parents, may they have a long life, aren’t going to be around forever.  My siblings have their own lives and no doubt soon, will have their own kids.  Their lives will be theirs.  What plans should I be putting in place incase I ever do become ill, can’t work, can’t do anything for myself?

I can already feel myself getting tired.  How do I forge out a comfortable future for myself?  I don’t want to work myself to the ground.  I’ve been thinking recently about taking myself to Saudi Arabia for a couple of years, earning a buck and atleast being comfortable enough to have my own home outright.

We can talk about how money isn’t important and it shouldn’t be but it is.  I don’t believe myself to be money orientated but I am logical.  As a single woman, I will need it to be able to fend for myself and to be able to live.  I detest reliance and hope to never have to be dependant on anybody for it.

I don’t mind admitting, while I’m at it, that I am terrified at the thought of dying alone too.

9 thoughts on “All the Single Ladies

  1. have faith that Allah will deal with all your affairs and it will all be good in shaa Allah, because He loves you and because there is ease after every difficulty .. the ease is unfolding and unfolding and unfolding .. as are the blessings .. in shaa Allah you won’t be alone, you haven’t been thus far and won’t be .. so much has yet to happen!

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    • Dear reader, I appreciate your sentiments of support and respect/admire your position. If I’m honest however, I do believe that leaving it to God alone is somewhat of a cop out and I am probably being slight controversial in saying this. It doesn’t demean my beliefs in God however I don’t feel I can lie back with the knowledge that things will just work out as for all I know and sometimes I fear it, God may not be very happy with me.

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      • Hey hi…. Well i like your blog written very well and the quite true abt current life of many girls not only u. I myself divorced and can say that very proud of it right decision taken at the right time but we r humans anf of course we get worried abt future how will we manage our life… Well i think first of all we should Pray and relai on Allah beshak he makes an easy way for us but definately he gve us body and brains so we can plan our life accordingly and his plans r the best for us. I myself used to be very modern up to date liberal girl still am but i ve changed myself and found peace only after beinng close to Allah so having a bit faith is always good 🙂 i am 30 yrs old not in search of a husband or any support for surviving… I get worried abt same as u what inget ill or left alone…. But i think we girls r quite strong and with all the hardships we will find a way In sha Allah. Mostly be practical and concentrate on your career but dont forget to enjoy ur life paralel… And dont give a damn abt stupid mentalily of ” typical cultural ppl ” if u know what i mean 😉 wish u all the very best be happy 😊

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  2. Hi! I just stumbled upon your blog and i love it! You write very well! Look forward to seeing more from you! iA hope things work out well for you! Would love your support if you could follow me back as well, and support a fellow paki girl out here! 🙂

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  3. Salam,

    It is hard when you are by yourself without a partner to share the downs and ups in life. The only advice I have is keep working hard try to invest. You have potential to go and make your dreams into reality. Allah (SWT) only knows why he gives us the hurdles he does, I’m sure he knows you can ankle it and you will survive. I promise you will, I did it for 8 years before meeting hubby, it is hard but keep your goals and hop up.

    Anything is possible as long as you want it. I wish you success and happiness to you. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Salam, I came across your blog and you have my utmost admiration for taking the steps that you did and the sheer courage you have portrayed.

    I wish I could make you believe that Allah isn’t unhappy with you. It’s the same with parents isn’t it? They love us despite our very obvious flaws and broken promises. I believe so does Allah. I wish you joy, peace and strength.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Burntbreakfast, what a brilliant message. Thank you for it and you couldn’t be more right, writing is such a therapy, something I never fully realised until I started this journey x

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