Getting older worries me, a lot more post divorce, than what it ever used to. I don’t focus on getting married nor have naive notions about some husband providing for me. I was never provided for when I was married anyway yet I still have many concerns for my future.
What if I become ill? My parents, may they have a long life, aren’t going to be around forever. My siblings have their own lives and no doubt soon, will have their own kids. Their lives will be theirs. What plans should I be putting in place incase I ever do become ill, can’t work, can’t do anything for myself?
I can already feel myself getting tired. How do I forge out a comfortable future for myself? I don’t want to work myself to the ground. I’ve been thinking recently about taking myself to Saudi Arabia for a couple of years, earning a buck and atleast being comfortable enough to have my own home outright.
We can talk about how money isn’t important and it shouldn’t be but it is. I don’t believe myself to be money orientated but I am logical. As a single woman, I will need it to be able to fend for myself and to be able to live. I detest reliance and hope to never have to be dependant on anybody for it.
I don’t mind admitting, while I’m at it, that I am terrified at the thought of dying alone too.